TITHONUS' DIARY!!


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in camera
2003-01-28 - 11:10 p.m.

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I now have a digital camera. As you can see, I've gone mad with power.

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Um, in other news, my supervisor has returned so I'm going to have to get back into gear with my work. Not that I've really fallen that far out of gear but, well, you know.

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I, uh... Probably the most intense emotion I felt today was, um... I was reading this message board that I read, and somebody has said, "define inner beauty for me". And the thing is, there were just reams and reams of responses which all said, "there's no such thing as inner beauty! It's just an excuse that ugly people make!" And I felt sad that there was so much cynicism around, that cynicism was so prevalent that it was just the kind of default attitude that everyone adopted. And it wasn't even *interesting* cynicism. See, if someone had disputed the existence of any sort of beauty, well that would show some sort of thinking on the issue, you know? If somebody had engaged with the question, said something original or thoughtful or with some sort of sensitivity to the question of the meaning of that word, "beauty", then it wouldn't have been sad at all. But instead here were these sad pages of text devoted to nothing more than people putting up their hand and saying, "I, also, am too intelligent to pay any attention to this question." Bah. BAH I SAY!

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"I came so far for beauty

I left so much behind

My patients and my family

My materpiece unsigned

I thought I'd be rewarded

For such a lonely choice

And surely she would answer

To such a hopeless voice?

But no, I could not touch her

With such a heavy hand

Her star beyond my order

Her nakedness unmanned" - Leonard Cohen


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